For all you mass transit loving fools like me, check out the blog I wish I had created: http://www.munimanners.com/. By now you've probably read my rants about the latest Muni mishaps, and there are still more to come. What I love about this site is it takes an Emily Post-worthy look at our bus system here in SF, stating the (what should be) obvious in a humorous way. From not singing to not picking your nose (well, yeah!), can you believe people don't know this stuff?Might I suggest the following new rules:
1. If I can hear your iTunes through your earbuds, turn it down!
2. If you must partake in food or drink (which are prohibited), please make sure that a) you can't smell it (i.e. Chinese food), b) you can't hear it (i.e. slurping) or c) you can't feel it (i.e. spilling). Maybe you shouldn't eat or drink after all.
3. Shower.
4. Don't talk crazy talk.
5. Do not sit in the middle of the 5 seats on the back row of the bus like there aren't 2 seats on either side of you. There are. And they're prime seats, too, because limited people can touch you. So scoot over!
6. In case the doors and walls of the bus weren't enough to tip you off, you're inside, so DO NOT SPEAK IN OUTSIDE VOICES TO YOUR FRIENDS. (Yelling effect achieved by all caps?)
7. Stay within your allotted seat. I make a conscious effort to keep my coat and bags within my contained area, so why can't you?
8. Shower.
9. If I'm reading or listening to an iPod, I don't want to talk to you. That is my way of escaping. Please do not try to chat me up or lobby for the political issue du jour. I would probably give you directions if you're a tourist though, because you don't know any better and you're easy to pick out in your San Francisco hoodie you bought at the wharf.
10. Do not perform personal hygiene-type activities such as cutting/filing nails, picking teeth, etc. Gross me out. It is ok to lightly apply makeup IMO.
The only rule I violate according to Muni Manners is the cell phone rule, but I tell myself it's ok if I'm very quiet (and I am, if you've ever talked to me). Just remember - you're never in private, so don't discuss work or serious personal issues openly on the bus! (Although they are more fun to listen to than just the run of the mill schedule update, for those of us listening.)
Got your own mass transit gripes? List 'em here!
5 comments:
I took offense to the comment you made about how you spot the tourists. It has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that I have a San Francisco hoodie that I bought at the Warf hanging in my closet.
Love,
Momma Neal
So do you ever ride the trolley? Or is that another way to spot tourists?
genius. truly. i would also add "do not spit on bus". unfortunately that is not a given.
no, we do not take the cable car. some people do, like my coworker camille, but that's only because she lives right near a line. there are only 3 active lines now and they are not close to us. plus, it's $5/ride unless you have a pass (and i don't get enough money out of a pass)
agreed. rule #11 - do not spit on bus! this goes back to the time i sat in a loogie. how quickly i forget!
OMG. I haven't stopped laughing.
And yes, I can tell the difference between "katie on the bus" volume level and "katie walking through union square" level.
there's also the "katie singing into a gerber daisy" level, but i will call you about that this week.
love you, miss you!
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